Yesterday went from being our best day so far to our worst. We are at Children’s hospital awaiting surgery to align Suzie’s femur and place her in a spica cast.
Her leg buckled while trying to pull herself up to standing position yesterday evening. I had left her alone with Brian for our longest time yet while I took Addie to her middle school orientation.
That morning we had re-introduced her to a walking helper harness. She had previously rejected it, but I showed her how it works with a teddy bear and then she was all about it. We walked with it all morning and she was just beaming...so proud!
We visited her future daycare and she even wore it there. At daycare I left her for 10 minutes and snuck away out of the room. After asking for me a couple times, she was content to play with the group. It was a huge success!
After that we had a friend of mine visit with her daughter and she did great then too. She was worn out by nap time but is so hyper vigilant that she usually doesn’t nap. I decided to give her a sleep mask to help her calm down and she fell asleep quickly!
We were going to bring her to Addie’s middle school night but she was working on a bowel movement and it hadn’t come yet. She basically gives birth every couple days complete with moaning and head sweats. Brian offered to stay home with her. It seemed like the right time after such a good day. He said that she was doing great- letting him carry her around and having a fun time until it happened. Her little leg just gave out- no fall, no trauma.
Well, that’s not true, there is trauma. She is very traumatized and it appears that she is once again fearful of Brian. Why did this have to happen with him?! He is also very traumatized. His drive to Children’s was awful and every time he moved her she was in excruciating pain. I’m traumatized that I left her. I wasn’t there for her. Addie and Mason are both shook up.
It appears that we’ve lost her trust. This is such a setback in so many ways- physically, emotionally and relationally.
We have surgery at 1:15pm which means no food or drink until then. She keeps asking for water and I can’t explain to her why I can’t give her some. When I tell her I love her she shakes her head and cries.
This is the worst.
UPDATE
Surgery is now delayed until 5:30 or 6pm. Hopefully we don’t have to stay another night. Suzie is comfortably medicated and they are letting her have clear liquids, so she’s happier. We are done with our pity party and just moving forward. Thank you for all the encouragement and help! This whole adoption has been so humbling and you all are showing us how to love well! Thank you for being our village!
UPDATE 2
Suzie is out of surgery. She did really well and the doctors and nurses were incredible. As expected, she was grouchy and groggy waking up but soon recognized Kassie and calmed down. We got her back to the room in her new purple spica cast which covers her entire left leg and her stomach, but they left her right leg free to move. After getting our stuff gathered up we put Suzie in a wagon and wheeled her to the car, pick up her meds and headed home. Our friends loaned us their enormous bean bag chair and Suzie has been there since, I think she's enjoying being waited-on, and the meds. Now for the real adventure.
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| sleeping beauty, she needs the mask to nap |
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| at daycare hanging out |
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| walking with mason, about 30 minutes before fracture |
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| left femur fracture, this is about an hour after break |
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| getting a splint before driving to Chilren's in Aurora |
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| Watching Baby Signing Time on the phone |
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| Being spoon-fed beef broth |
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| Kassie slept in the chair next to the bed |
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| Brian slept on the couch |
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| heading into surgery |
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| waking up from surgery with a sore throat |
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| First time seeing the purple spica cast |
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| wagon ride to the car |
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| Brian with the new car seat for the spica cast |
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| finally home, watching Baby Signing Time from the bean bag |
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